Lisa and Anne of the Brittish Royalty variety....

Hang with me and read the the end as this may be the funniest thing that has happened to us yet...After we became pros at riding the vapporeto's (see Anne's blog) we used this method to get through most of the grand canal last night. We rode out to Harry's Bar (most famous bar in the world...and strap on for Anne's account of our experience in there), for a Bellini then we walked over to Piazza San Marco (for those of you not familiar with this term, Piazza is basically a big open square that is surrounded by a church (basillica) in most cases and many restaurants, sometimes a fountain in the middle and lots of kids running around, dogs on walks, street performers, etc. San Marco is the most famous piazza here in Venice as its surrounded by the Doge's palace which is akin to Versailles in France, as well as the glorious San Marco Basillica).

So we are now at the tail end of the Fish (see map of Venice by clicking the link on the side of the blog) and must traverse the grand canal to get back to our hotel which is at the lower west end of Santa Croce district.(The canal, by the way is absolutely gorgeous and like the Tuscan countryside, moreso than imaginable. It is full of gondoliers just as you see in the movies, beautiful architecture, people bustling about on the canal streets, etc.) Since San Marco is a hot spot the vapporetto's (think subway for the water. Its set up the same way except with boats) are crowded. There are areas to stand and areas with many seats like on a bus. So we go in and sit down. A very old man and woman get on at the next stop up (they were complete doubles of the Shoemackers in Dirty Dancing) and have to separate to sit down. Both shuffled and then sat for quite a while. When some people got off, I got up to sit next to Anne on the other side of the isle and in seconds the old man shuffled up to sit next to me. He was adorable. He is all of 4 ft 11in, max. And in dog years would already be about 75 so I imagine he was about 150 years old but Anne thinks more like 85-90. Sure that he is a tried and true Venetian, I don't attempt to talk to him other than saying Ciaò. So he then looks at me (inches from my face) and in the most broken English asks "first in Venice?" and I think a second and then say "sì, sì" Then I think he asks me if I speak Italian and I answer "non Italiano, mì Inglese." So he opens his eyes wide and exclaims "Welcome to my country. I luf your-a country!" and Anne and I say back to him "We love your country. Italia es Bella!" And he then says...are you ready for this...."And I luf-a your-a Queen. Ah, Ah, Uh...Elisabeth!" Out of respect for this Ancient and endearing old man and the fact that our conversation is likely to be short due to language barriers, we decide to just say "gratzi, sì." So then he goes on to say "And Camilla y Charles!" And we say "sì,sì" then he thinks a minute and says "And Harry, the little one!" and he can't rememeber the older one so I say to him "William." and he says "Yes! I luf-a William!" Then he says "Your queen helped me in-a 19 and uh, 26-a. I luf her!" (not sure what happened in 1926 but we'll research this when we have more time.) So now we are trapped in this and just say "sì,sì." So at this point I feel like I should at least introduce Anne and I since we have had this completely fabricated conversation with this man. I tell him "chiamo Lisa y Anne" and he gets wide eyed and slows down his pronunciation completely and says "mì chiamo Yoooooosefff (Joseph)! You are nice!" and we say "Gratzi, you are nice" and he says "I am old." we can't argue with this so we counter with "but very nice!" So then he procedes to point out landmarks along the canal complete with translations to English (very slow, very wide eyed and very proud) and didn't skip a beat. He got them all correct and it was apparent he had done this before. In idle chat we discovered that he lived in Maestre, just a short train stop back out of Venice and he was there visiting his sister, the older woman he got on the boat with. She was only 125 in dog years and just as adorable. So then he points out a tall tower and says "radio." I didn't quite understand him so I repeat it back to him "radio?" and he says..."sì, sì like-a you BBC!" And we both, trying not to bust out laughing say "ahhh...sì, BBC!" We travelled through about two more stops on the canal and then he pointed out that Ferrovia was our stop. He had to get up to let us off and he took the time to take both of our hands and kiss them. I think he may have kissed my ring.

So here is the summary. We will never forget Joseph and all of his charm and want to befriend us and welcome us to his country. He embodies the spirit of most people we have encountered in Italy, especially the men. We will certainly never forget his love of England and our Queen and his admiration for our country. We are still perplexed that he didn't find our accent to be off a bit but perhaps he thinks we are from Southern England, VERY Southern England. And thus, I leave you my friends feeling a wee bit royal this morning.

We are off to the Guggenheim Museum to see the greatest collection of modern art anywhere. Then we will make our way to the central exhibition of the Biennale. See link on the side bar so you will see how incredibly lucky we are to be here for this.

We are hurting a little more each day that we get up, both of us have a little scratchy throat today and we are missing our families. That aside, we are having a ball and are overwhelmed, humbled and appreciative of all that we are seeing and learning about art and the culture of the Italian people.

Arrevaderci, Lisa